Dear Harlan: I have this problem when I meet people. I always think about what I said and did after the conversation. I have this fear that I’ve done something weird or wrong. I’ve never been great at meeting people.

I’ve started a new job and desperately want to fit in. I know that making friends is something that takes time, but I’d love any advice on how not to be so concerned about what everyone else thinks. It’s been a lifelong problem for me. It gets so bad that it makes it hard for me to focus on my work. I feel like I’m back in middle school. — Self-conscious

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